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Jun 20, 2008

Do You Quit Too Easily?

Quick Note: The Better Sleep series will continue next week, as I’ve spent my post-writing time reading SEO School from the mistress of home business tips, Naomi Dunford.  Review coming tomorrow.  If you’re new here, check that Better Sleep series out!

From the I-Couldn’t-Have-Said-It-Better department …

Michael Martine (my favorite blog consulting master) knocks it out of the park in a Men With Pens post:

One thing that bugs me to no end is when people say “I tried,” when what they’re really saying is they only put in a little effort and then gave up.

When I was in the Marines (yes, I really was, but was injured in basic and let go) I was told to find something in the barracks by one of the drill instructors. I looked for what seemed to me like a reasonable amount of time and reported back to him that I couldn’t find it.

He looked at me and said, real slowly, “Then I guess you ain’t done lookin’ yet, are you?”

I got the message, and that message has stayed with me ever since.

Do You Get The Message?

Are you giving up too easily?  Trying something once, or just for a little while, and then telling yourself you just don’t have it in you to make it work?

On some level, you know that you’re bull$hitting yourself.

Today, and every day, why don’t you imagine your own mental drill instructor who will tell you, real slowly, “Well, I guess you ain’t done tryin’ yet?”

Think of something you’ve been giving up on lately.  Lay it on yourself.  Remind yourself that you’re not a quitter.  See how it makes an instant difference.  Enjoy.

More Monday,

Dave

(PS – If you haven’t checked out “What’s Holding You Back?,” check it out soon.  Michael has convinced me to raise the price soon).

21 Responses to “Do You Quit Too Easily?”

  • Jun 20, 2008 Michael Martine

    Glad my experience in boot camp can do some good for others. :)

    Michael Martine’s last blog post..Create a Business Out of Your Blog and Make Real Money

  • Jun 20, 2008 Hunter Nuttall

    Michael, are you still lookin’?

    Hunter Nuttall’s last blog post..Do You Have A Squidoo Lens?

  • Jun 20, 2008 Michael Martine

    @Hunter: every day, man. ;)

    Michael Martine’s last blog post..Create a Business Out of Your Blog and Make Real Money

  • Jun 20, 2008 Brett Legree

    @Dave,

    Looks like Michael kicked your a$$ and my a$$ today, didn’t he? :)

    -Brett

    Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays – you ain’t done lookin’ yet.

  • Jun 20, 2008 Dave Navarro

    @Brett -

    Hell yes, he did.

  • Jun 20, 2008 Michael Martine

    Phooey, you guys. I’m here to kick general ass, not ass at the specific individual level. :)

    Michael Martine’s last blog post..Create a Business Out of Your Blog and Make Real Money

  • Jun 20, 2008 Marelisa

    I guess the motto “look until you find it” is basically about persistence. At the end of the day the people who really achieve their goals are not necessarily the most talented, but the most persistent. I’m going to try the drill instructor approach (I actually already imagine a drill instructor when I’m on the treadmill jogging and I want to stop before the 40 minutes are up).

    Marelisa’s last blog post..The Elasticity of Time (Part 2)

  • Jun 20, 2008 Steph

    Funny reading Martine’s quote today! Not five minutes ago, I realized that I am quitting, or I had quit, probably the biggest dream of my life. That dream is really fleshed out in my mind, but so expensive to accomplish I couldn’t even finish the business plan. I just can’t get my mind around how I’m going to get the money to do it. I can’t make myself finish the plan because I’ve reached the really hard part. I’ve got the name, I know what it looks like, I know which end of town I want it (but no building has come up), I know what we offer, to whom, all that stuff. But I’ve been quitting the idea of actually accomplishing it. I’ve stopped trying to find ways to do it. I hate that because I really do want this even more than the dreams I listed on a recent post. Yes, I want to be a writer and have a nice home, etc. But this one thing, this very amazing, perfect thing, is so hard, and I don’t know how to keep trying.

    Steph’s last blog post..Hazelnut Vanilla-Flavoured Marketing

  • Jun 20, 2008 Michael Martine

    @Steph there’s a difference between having a calling and letting pipe dreams distract us from improving our lives in a real, concrete fashion. I speak from experience. I had all these grandiose dreams that were so big I could not help but fail, so therefore I did not even start.

    But a calling is different. Something you are not using as a shield against your own success is different. Once you answer the call and commit to it, you are along for the ride. You have swallowed the red pill, and welcome to the Matrix. You will do whatever it takes like a madwoman.

    Ever since I started Remarkablogger, I am now a man possessed. My success is inevitable. Once you’re in the Matrix, you can’t go back. I’m not trying to warn you off, but just trying to get you to see it in different terms. If it’s meant to be, then you will find a way. You do one thing. Just one. Then you do another. Then another. Your mind will be solving problems and connecting the dots while you are doing other things. It will be surreal. You will be unstoppable.

    Michael Martine’s last blog post..Create a Business Out of Your Blog and Make Real Money

  • Jun 20, 2008 Kelly

    Dave,

    Everybody got turned on by that comment yesterday. Lovely to see it here too. Now I apologize, I must comment to your commenter:

    Michael,

    The comment right above me here is The Best F–ing Comment I Have Ever Read Anywhere. The first paragraph is GOLD, man. Gold.

    If I wasn’t already reading both your blogs I’d go subscribe right now.

    Hitting print instantly.

    Regards,

    Kelly

    Kelly’s last blog post..Free Slippery Advice, Today Only

  • Jun 21, 2008 Steph

    Holy crap, Kelly just made a swear. And she NEVER swears. So that was one kickass comment, all right.

    And it was. I have to think on it, but I know there’s something very important there to consider. I had all kinds of confusion reactions reading it.

    Thanks, Michael!

    Steph’s last blog post..Hazelnut Vanilla-Flavoured Marketing

  • Jun 21, 2008 Steph

    PS. People start businesses every day. While it’s true not all are successful, I don’t see why mine (opening a bookstore/tearoom, which I know people want here) would have to be a pipe dream, since it’s not impossible. It’s just that it seems impossible to me. Only because of the money. But that’s a big only.

    Steph’s last blog post..Hazelnut Vanilla-Flavoured Marketing

  • Jun 21, 2008 Steph

    Maybe things are only pipe dreams if you quit acting on them and only wish.

    Steph’s last blog post..Hazelnut Vanilla-Flavoured Marketing

  • Jun 21, 2008 Steph

    But it doesn’t mean one can’t get over their fears and limiting thoughts to finally achieve their dreams…

    Okay, sorry. Too many comments.

    Steph’s last blog post..Hazelnut Vanilla-Flavoured Marketing

  • Jun 21, 2008 Steph

    @Michael: I believe in callings, I do. But the more I think about your first paragraph, the more I disagree with it: “@Steph there’s a difference between having a calling and letting pipe dreams distract us from improving our lives in a real, concrete fashion. I speak from experience. I had all these grandiose dreams that were so big I could not help but fail, so therefore I did not even start.”

    I don’t think I believe in pipe dreams, or in dreams being too grandiose to accomplish. Your experience doesn’t define what is necessarily true, by which I mean people have accomplished some pretty incredible BIG things. Perhaps it’s simply a matter of desire and belief. You believed those dreams to be pipe dreams, too grandiose, and that you couldn’t ever fulfil them. Thus, you didn’t. Either that, or you REALLY didn’t want to. I’m aware of how cheesy and flaky this might sound, but I can, if I really believe I can, find the money to start my business. I just can’t get past the idea of how and I’m also very scared of the work! But it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s not right for me or that I shouldn’t try because it just really isn’t possible.

    Please don’t take this as criticism. I’m not saying you were/are a weak person regarding your big dreams, by any means. I just think that too often we give up (as I have) on dreams they have because of how negative we become. Instead of believing we’ll have that Mercedes, for instance (though it doesn’t have to be something material), now that we’re older we’re just happy our car starts. You know? Remember how much we dreamed when we were younger?

    I guess it’s also partly a matter of asking the right questions and then finding what you love most. Rather than your other dreams, you found something that was more attractive to you and I’m very happy you did, because I can see how much you love what you do and how you affect others in a great way, as well.

    Steph’s last blog post..Hazelnut Vanilla-Flavoured Marketing

  • Jun 21, 2008 Michael Martine

    @Steph – I don’t take that as a criticism at all. What’s true for one person is not true for another. I probably didn’t write it as well as I could have, but I was trying to get at the idea that there are dreams and there are lies, and some people confuse the two. Dreams can be manifested, but lies always somehow just remain as lies (at least it seems that way to me). Dreams soar, lies (pun intended) just lie there. Dreams empower, lies disempower.

    Maybe those are better words than “calling” and “pipe dream.” Move, and you influence others, and they move with you in ways you could never have anticipated.

    I hope that you can make your dream a reality.

    Michael Martine’s last blog post..Create a Business Out of Your Blog and Make Real Money

  • Jun 22, 2008 Nathalie Lussier

    I always learn something new when I visit this site. Thanks again for your personal views. I think I’m going to need to read more about the topic though. :)

    Nathalie Lussier’s last blog post..Anne Cox Chambers

  • Jun 22, 2008 Steph

    @ Michael,

    I think the difference is what you touched on: action. No action certainly means you won’t accomplish that dream. But I believe it’s our limiting thoughts that prevent the action, rather than the dream being something that’s an impossible notion. Quadriplegics with no chance of walking have walked. Man walked on the moon, people who’ve lost billions have regained it; everywhere in the world we are daily accomplishing seemingly impossible, sometimes even ridiculous sounding goals. One man cured cancer in many patients with nothing more than large doses of vitamin C.

    The lies, I think, are only what we tell ourselves: that the dream is stupid, impossible, too late, even. Sometimes, I admit, depending on what it is, it IS too late, because we didn’t act on it when we had the chance. A 50-yr-old with long-time dreams of being in the NHL is hardly likely to get in now. Thankfully, like yours, dreams evolve, and we have many chances to accomplish wonderful things.

    Thanks for this discussion. It’s helping me tremendously! :)

    Steph’s last blog post..This is My Brain. This is My Brain on (No) Drugs

  • Jun 22, 2008 Michael Martine

    @Steph, me too! Nothing clarifies your thinking like having to explain it to someone else. :)

    Michael Martine’s last blog post..Create a Business Out of Your Blog and Make Real Money

  • Jun 26, 2008 Koka

    Found you through SU and with this post got instant credibility. I’ll be digging through your posts. Thanks for the great content!

    Koka’s last blog post..15 Fun Facts About Steve Carell

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