5 Must-Have Skills For Million Dollar Networkers

Written by Dave Navarro on January 9, 2008

Are you short-changing your business by doing half-assed networking?

Networking Giant Bob Burg once said that those who master networking “do the little things right, consistently.” Imagine someone describing you as a “networking giant,” because you’re doing the little things right, too. It’s time to make certain that you’re using the skills that will move you upward, so read on; class is in session.

Skill #1: Giving (Before Taking)
There’s an expression you may have heard before: “Givers Get.” This is the mantra, the cornerstone of successful networking. What you want your contact to remember when they think of you is how you were a contributor, how you actually helped add value to their business or their lives.

Those who struggle with networking usually approach contacts as prospects, as someone to sell themselves to. But your contacts don’t want to be sold on you - they have too much on their plate to hear about how great you are. What they really want is for their projects to be successful and their lives to be easier. Help them with that, and you’re “sold” without even trying.

In other words, make the spirit of giving the driving objective in your networking efforts, and you will succeed like never before.

If you can solve (or contribute to solving) a contact’s pressing problem you instantly gain credibility, rapport and top-of-mind position. That’s like gold for your business, but you won’t get it without …

Skill #2: Drawing (Asking Questions, Only Smarter)
Does your contact want to hear about you? Unless your reputation precedes you, the answer is likely no. They have a lot of things on their mind, the demands of multiple projects swirling around, and the last thing they’re going to want to do is spend time validating you on how interesting you are (hint: if they’re interested in what you do / who you are, they will take it upon themselves to ask).

So you don’t want to force facts about yourself onto them. Instead, you want to draw out the facts of their life that they are most interested in. Ask them how they got started. Ask them what they’re up to. Listen to their responses, and listen closer for emotional cues. When they talk about what they are doing, what do they sound most energized by? What do they sound most harried about?

Your contact will appreciate your interest, especially since your targeted questions show that you’re really listening. You know from experience the difference between when somebody “listens” to what you’re saying as opposed to when they’re actually “interested” in what you’re saying. Let the quality of your questions leave no doubt in your contact’s mind that you are focused on them.

Ultimately, as you pay attention to their verbal and non-verbal cues, and you draw out the answers are most emotionally charged for them, you’ll discover what their most important project is (or the one they’re most excited about). Then you can ask the the home-run question:

“What can I do to help you with (or add value to) what you’re doing?”

Naturally, you’re not trying to take on extra workload here, though. What you’re really after is discovering one of two things:

1. Is there something that’s very easy for me to do that would be difficult for this contact to do? (If so, offering to help is a powerful way to make an unforgettable impression)
2. Do I know the person who can solve this contact’s problem? (If so, a quick introduction may be all it takes to be the hero here).

Skill #3 -Following-Up (Don’t Be A One-Night Stand)
Don’t let follow-up be left to chance. After your initial flurry of contacts (which will come naturally because you’re adding value to their most important project, right?), you’ll need a natural “in” to allow you to keep the relationship alive. You want to stay top-of-mind with your contact so they have good reason to initiate staying in touch with you.

I’ll write more about how to manage your follow-ups, but for the moment, simply keep tabs on what they’re up to so you know when to contact them. If they have a project launching in 6 months, make a note to yourself to follow up with them to see how it’s going. And of course, ask them again how you can add value.
(More on this in an upcoming article.)

Skill #4 - Connecting (Continue to Give)
The more you build your network, the wider your sphere of influence will become. Your contacts list will contain a broader collections of skills and resources that you can leverage when you’re networking with new people.

When you realize that your new contact’s needs fit nicely with the skill sets of people you already know, ask them if they would like you to send an introductory email to break the ice. Connect them with useful people, and they will welcome your continued contact.

As you become a source of connections for your new contacts, they will volunteer to connect you with other people as well. If you’ve used all these skills well, you won’t be surprised at how many times you hear the unsolicited words, “You’ve done so much for me … now what can I do for you?”

When that happens, you close the circle with …

Skill #5 - Receiving (Your Just Reward)
When your new contact asks you those six magic words, “what can I do for you,” you want to be good and ready. The way to be ready is to have your own list of things you need handy. This doesn’t have to be a physical list, but you should be conscious of a few resources that you believe your contact has access to. You don’t want to say “I’ll get back to you” and risk losing the momentum you’ve built up with this contact.

At this point, you’re ready to ask them to connect you with someone specific that they may know, or someone who has access to skills/information/resources that you need. Since they offered to do something for you, they’ll generally be happy to connect you (be sure to ask them when you can expect the introduction so it happens quickly).

And when your contact connects you with the people you’re after, it won’t just be any introduction. It will be an introduction that starts out with your contact bragging about what you’ve done for them … and that sets you up as the hero from day one.

And that’s what networking is all about.

Bonus Skill #6+ … You Fill In The Blank
Have the tips I’ve just given helped you? If so, why don’t you give back right now in the form of a comment describing your #1 networking strategy? You’ll help others (remember, givers get, and you’ll learn from the other comments on this post). Go ahead and leave a comment now, and then sign up for email updates (or the RSS feed) so you get all the articles in this better networking series.

You know what to do,
Dave